If a mother’s love feels it has to turn into self sacrifice in order to keep a child from suffering at the hands of doctors and protective services, something is wrong. For those that have not, I request you watch this incredibly profound documentary “Take care of Maya” on the seriousness of our flawed system that claims to protect us all. But does it?
Of course this story is not every story of a child’s visit to the ER, but when there’s more than one occurrence, hundreds more, then something has to change.
Maya had severe crippling pain that came suddenly as a child, and her parents went to every doctor they could find (which apparently is considered “doctor shopping” in the child abuse dictionary) but no doctor gave any answers. The pain was getting worse, and the child’s legs were beginning to bow. Mom knew she had to do something, so she went to a doctor who finally diagnosed her with CRPS (Complex regional pain syndrome) and stated she needed ketamine; in high doses. It didn’t really work, but it seemed she needed even higher doses which was a treatment only available in Mexico. Her parents made the decision, and she was put under with large doses of ketamine. When she came out of the coma, she was massively improved. And for a year her symptoms were practically gone.
They couldn’t afford the first doctor anymore, so they got a recommendation for another doctor specializing in CRPS who could help.
One night she had massive stomach pain. Her mother was not there at the time. Maya was admitted to the ER by her father around the age of 10, she began to relapse. Apparently CRPS is very unpredictable, and pain Managment is a continuous battle. The child then remained in the hospital, and the mother (who is a registered nurse) told them that she’s diagnosed with CRPS and needs ketamine. The doctors did not feel that was necessary and didn’t believe Maya’s mother. They in fact decided that she could not see her child, and literally ripped her child away. Maya’s mom, Beata, was then accused of child abuse due to Munchausen syndrome by proxy, a mental disorder in which a caregiver fakes or causes symptoms to make a child look sick. Separated from her daughter right away. Child protective services assumed the child was making up all her pain, the mother was now to blame. Beata, her mother, recorded every conversation, everything was documented, but the Child Protective Services put the entire blame on her. Wouldn’t allow her to see her child, they attended court dates, one of which the judge said to place a protective order on the child against Beata who had done nothing. Beata fainted in shock. Sadly, over 80 days passed; and a court date occurred only for the judge to not allow the child a hug from her own mother.
Within the hospital, Maya was being pined against her mother. Being told she was making her illness up. Saying mean and horrible things about her mother. But why? Why push a narrative, so hard. Maya was crying on the phone to her mother, pleading to come home. That the doctors weren’t even taking care of her. Maya’s mother was told by the original doctor who diagnosed her, that she would die a slow and painful death without treatment. Her mother did not know what to do.
Eventually Maya’s mother saw no other choice, the fact was that this case was against her; if she was out of the picture… Maya would be free to come home to her father. Maya, the sunshine of her life, would have to lose her own mother to be safe from the hands of lies and captivity within the hospital.
Maya’s mother hung herself in the garage; leaving a note stating how the system destroyed their family, and took her child from her, and emphasized the importance to take care of maya. Take care of Maya. This allowed Maya to be able to come home, because now the “threat” was gone. Leaving Maya without the one she loved most.
What shocks me the most is truly the lack of thorough investigation as to whether a child is actually a victim of abuse or not. CPS can be privatized, and as the employees they should be looking into it more deeply, not making rash decisions and telling children they’re making up their pain. Child abuse is real, and must be prevented at all costs; but the cost is not negligence and emotional distress that results in the death of a child’s innocent parent. All because they trusted the ER to take care of their daughter? Take care of Maya, they did not. And this is happening to more people daily than we care to imagine.
As one victim of this system, Ashley, said so eloquently “There’s been so many cases, so many families that have been affected and wrongly accused.” She continues, “How many times are you allowed to be wrong and destroy peoples lives before they say, “okay, that’s enough. It’s time that we change some things”? What is it truly gonna take?”
The absolute unbelievable love that Maya’s mother had for her daughter… brought streaming tears to my eyes. The loss Maya had to endure, when already having to deal with a crippling illness… it breaks your very being down to pieces. This should not, and cannot continue to, happen.
RIP Beata, a strong willed mother who would do anything to truly protect her daughter.